Business Lyceum

e-Letter
Practical Instruction in the Arts and Sciences of Making Money

OCTOBER 2000


Greetings & Salutations:

Please, don't ask me ...

What's Wrong With My Ad Copy?

I don't know - and - neither does anyone else. -- Beyond that, you are asking the wrong question.

Granted, there may be obviously inappropriate, unfitting, unsuitable, improper, inept, inapt, incongruous, unseemly, or unbecoming words or phrases - or - an over use or misuse of jargon, vocabulary, dialect, idiom, terminology, lexicon, cant, or vernacular in your ad copy - but - whether it is right or wrong cannot be determined by simply "reading" the ad copy.

The only thing that separates real "professional" marketers from "amateur" and "beginner" marketers is testing, and retesting, and testing some more. รณ Only the "tested and proven" techniques, methods and approaches that produce results ... money in the bank ... are "right."

"Professional" marketers ...

Don't Test To Find Out What's Wrong With An Ad!

By testing, retesting, and testing some more, each "Professional" marketer creates, keeps and maintains a catalog of techniques, methods and approaches that have worked for them in the past ... whether that catalog is written down to share with others or just maintained in their cranial sarcophagus.

Further to their own "tested and proven" techniques, methods and approaches, the "Professional" marketers also keep and maintain the successful techniques, methods and approaches that other "Professional" marketers have written-down to share with others ... in books, booklets, reports, articles and clipped ads they keep in their archives and swipe files.

If "Professional" marketers tested to find out what was "wrong" with the ads they write, each of them would only have a catalog of techniques, methods and approaches that don't work ... instead of the catalog of techniques, methods and approaches that do work; upon which they have built successful ad campaigns for themselves and their clients.

But, all of the "professionals" are right - and - all of the "professionals" are wrong - because ... No single technique, method or approach is "always right"  for "every product or service."

Even if a specific technique, method and approach has worked a million times, it may or may not work for your product or service.

Think about it. -- If there were only one technique, method or approach that worked all the time, every time, for every product or service, ad copywriting would be the easiest job in the world.  All you would have to do would be to copy that technique, method or approach and plug-in the name and description of your product or service. -- Wouldn't that be wonderful?

As it stands, if you were to hire the 10 best copywriters in the world to create an ad campaign for your product or service, you would get 10 different ad campaigns. -- Each campaign would be based upon the "tested and proven" successful techniques, methods and approaches each copywriter had cataloged from their own experiences. -- There would, no doubt, be similarities in some of the campaigns, but no two of the ad campaigns would be alike.

Real "Professional" marketers aren't greatly concerned with what is "wrong" with any given ad-copy because, what may appear "wrong" to them today, may well be the next great marketing approach of tomorrow.  After all, how many of them might have thought it was "wrong," when the first letter with a $1 bill attached to the top of it was mailed.

In the marketing game ... whether it is mailorder marketing or not ...

Anything that works is "right" ...
anything that doesn't work is "wrong."

Therefore, instead of asking "What's Wrong With My Ad Copy?" you should, more rightly, be asking ...

What's Right With My Ad Copy?

Eliminate every thing else and you will have the foundation upon which you can begin building a successful ad, sales letter, or whatever.

When a new client employs me to create an ad-campaign ... or just write a sales letter ... or create a brochure ... for their product or service, the first thing I do is read and reread the ad-copy they are currently using.

As I read, I use my bright-pink highlighter pen to highlight those words, phrases, sentences and paragraphs that ... in my experienced opinion ... would have the greatest positive impact upon a potential buyer. -- Those highlighted words, phrases, sentences and paragraphs will be the foundation of "right" stuff upon which I will build the ad I write.  (Another copywriter, depending upon their own experience, may not highlight some of the words, phrases, sentences or paragraphs I choose - or - they may highlight other passages that I wouldn't.)

But, I'm not through, yet.

After I finish highlighting the "right" stuff in my client's sales materials, I go back through it with my red felt-tip pen to cross-out any passage that doesn't pass ...

The "Who Cares?" Test!

The "Who Cares?" test is exactly what it sounds like. -- I just read each passage and ask myself, "Who cares?"  If I don't care, why should I believe the customer will care? -- Cross it out.

By the way, it is much, much easier to conduct a "Who Cares?" test on someone else's sales piece than it is to do the test on your own ad-copy. -- That's why I have my wife do the "Who Cares?" test on my ad-copy. -- You should have someone else do the "Who Cares?" test on your ad-copy because you may "care" deeply that you wear boxer shorts, rather than briefs, but nobody else may ... unless, of course, the nature of your underwear is important to the sale of your product or service.  (Don't ask me what that might be.  Maybe, running for President?)

In other words, anything that isn't relevant to your customer's decision to "buy" your product or service ... or only satisfies your ego ... fits into the "Who cares?" category.

Next, I cross-out and ...

Eliminate anything that detracts from the perceived value of the product or service.

Sometimes these "detractors" are very subtle ... only perceived at the deepest subconscious level ... other times, they stick out like sore-thumbs.

Actually, I can't give you a hard, fast rule for finding "detractors" in your ad-copy.  It is, usually, just an "uneasy" feeling you get about the product or service, or marketer, when you read a word, phrase, sentence or paragraph.  It just doesn't make you feel right about buying ... either the product or service, or from that marketer.

One of the most often used "detractors" is a line I find in countless MLM offers. -- It usually goes something like this ...

"We know you've been trying to make money in MLM, but you have never made it."

I get a dozen or so sales pieces with a line like that every week and I'm not even involved in MLM.  So, how do they know I've been trying to make money in MLM, when I don't know it myself.

I wouldn't trust the marketer that makes that statement any farther than I can throw a loaded B-52 bomber. -- Why?

Have you ever heard the biblical admonition "Judge not, lest ye be judged"?? -- Most people have heard it but very few of them understand it.

The only "norm" YOU can use to make a "judgment" is your own knowledge and experience. -- Therefore, when a marketer tells me he knows I've been trying to do something (anything) but haven't been able to do it yet, that marketer leads me to believe that he has been trying to do it but hasn't done it, yet.  Maybe, if I "buy" into his plan, he'll be able to finally do it himself.

Anytime you pass "judgment" on anyone, about anything ... especially when you make that judgment without all the facts ... you are revealing to the world your own personal thoughts, experiences,  personality, and beliefs ... good and bad. -- Think about it!  ...  it goes a lot further than just ad-copy.

Of course, using this technique to find out what is "right" with your own ad-copy sounds a lot easier than it usually is. -- To do it right, you have to be unmerciful about crossing out words, phrases, sentences and paragraphs - and - highly discerning in your selection of passages to highlight. -- Unfortunately, most people find it very difficult to honestly pass judgment on themselves.  Therefore, it is best to have someone else do the crossing-out and highlighting for you.

But, once you have crossed-out all of the "Who cares?" passages, and the "detractors," from a sales piece, anything you have left-over ... especially the highlighted areas ... can be used as the foundation upon which you can begin building a successful ad, sales letter, or whatever.

Writing effective mailorder ad-copy ... or any other kind of ad-copy, for that matter ... is more "art" than "science." -- That's why I have never tried to "teach" ad-copy writing.

What I have told you about ad-copy writing in this issue, is nothing more than the "preparation of the canvas." But, once you are comfortable preparing your canvas, and applying the first broad brush strokes, the rest is only a matter of practice and testing, retesting, and testing some more.

Then, as you adapt, adopt, reformulate, enhance, alter, and otherwise employ the various and many marketing methods you encounter ... as we professionals do ... catalog the things that work for you. -- Those self-learned, self-tested and self-proven   techniques, methods and approaches will serve you well ... as you add to them ... throughout your lifetime.


What did people do before we had
Doctors, Hospitals and Pharmaceutical Companies?

In every society ... before Medical Doctoring became a profession ... there were those people in the community who were knowledgeable of the various herbs and spices, and how to prepare them, to affect cures; or at least offer relief, for the ailments suffered.  Today, those herbal preparations ... once the well guarded secrets of the medicine men and healers ... have been researched and synthesized into un-natural substances by the Pharmaceutical Companies, for distribution by the Medical professions.  But ... in some of the lesser developed nations, the populace still depend upon the local medicine men and healers for their herbal remedies.

Zanzibar ... an island off the eastern coast of Africa ... is such a place. -- On Zanzibar, the local Madawa (medicine man) is still the keeper of the healing secrets.  Now ...

The secrets of the Madawa can be yours!

Lyceum attendee Anita Schiltz , has brought some of the herbal preparations of the Zanzibar Madawas here; in the form of soaps, lotions, creams, teas and capsules ... offering those remedies for the relief of some of the common ailments and conditions in our society.

Rather than trying to give you a complete description of the "Madawa's" products ... and for what conditions they are used ... do yourself a favor and go look for yourself. -- I don't think you'll be disappointed.

Visit Anita's web site at:  http://www.madawas.com


Now, let's do some ...

Comments & Questions

Steve Kopcha asked:

"In preparing to begin my mailorder business in which I will run inquiry ads to get handraisers interested in "making money" and who will then receive your flyers from me for your line of books.. I notice that most of the classified ads in a recent issue of The National Enquirer are not "signed" with mailing addresses, but 800 telephone numbers.  What do you think?  Do you have any experience with any possible difference in rate-of-response when the advertiser uses an 800 number versus a mailing address? It sure is a lot easier to reply to an ad by calling a phone number, it seems to me.    This is something I need to figure out before I start running my inquiry ads... so thanks in advance for your info!"

Steve:

You will get a higher response to an 800# than to an address - but - in many cases, people will just call because it is a FREE telephone call. -- The best method is to use the 800# along with your mailing address.

I think you will find that those who "write" for info are more responsive because they had to take action on their own in order to get in touch with you.


Sandy wrote and asked:

"Just wanted to let you know that your material is the best I've seen on the internet ... I will be ordering via mail in the near future ... My question is this:  Can people still make a decent living selling reports offline by direct mail? I ask this because if you will take the time to visit a website I give to you...you will see that the author "use" to sell his reports offline and then turned the whole operation over to an online store ... Please look at his site all the way through and tell  me what you think. ... With sites like his it is going to be harder to sell people information don't you think?"

Sandy:

YES ... you can not only make a decent living selling offline, you CAN make a fortune. -- Internet marketing is just another method of selling.  There are still more mailorder buyers than there are internet buyers.

The promoter you mentioned has chosen to cater only to the on-line crowd - but - he will be missing the yet larger audience in the direct mail market.  Then again, maybe he wasn't selling very much by direct mail and, since he is still getting the same small returns on-line, he is satisfied with only one side of the market.


Matthew Pierce wrote:

"I received my first issue of your e-zine today and am writing to you having just read the entire issue.  I receive SOO many of them and read so few (beyond the headlines, that is) that I was so amazed that there is actually someone out on the "Net" who provides actual knowledge (what an amazing concept!).  As of yet, I haven't quite decided how to go about USING what I learned tonight.  I've become so jaded on the whole Internet marketing idea as being a venue for scams, frauds, and worthless "guru" advice.  I received a wonderful breath of fresh air tonight.  I'm actually holding out hope again that there JUST might be a way for me to work for the best boss in the world...ME.  Thanks again, Mr. Straw.  I'm looking forward to next month's issue."

Matthew:

Thank you!  --  Keep looking.  There IS a way for you - but - no one but you can find it for you.


Mike McGroarty wrote:

"I have been studying mail order and direct marketing for years, and as soon as I saw your name online I immediately recognized it and ordered your materials.  I have the complete collection of Jerry Buchanan's Towers Club newsletters, and I know Jerry spoke highly of you many times. How is Jerry doing, and is he still publishing a newsletter? After years of trying and experimenting with different products I finally have a line of self published info products that are selling well on and off line.  My best selling products have to do with gardening and starting a backyard nursery.  http://www.freeplants.com-- I know that a lot of your members are trying to find the key to the vault, just as I was for years.  I have a new site and a free e-mail newsletter where I tell others how a "meter reader" with few computer skills can go from reading electric and water meters to selling tens of thousands of dollars worth of books, reports, and homemade videos.  Interested people can go to http://www.homemadebooklets.com and subscribe to the newsletter. I am looking forward to receiving your materials and reading your newsletters."

Mike:

Thank You for your kind remarks.  I haven't heard from Jerry in over 7 years.  I do, however, know that Dan Kennedy bought a lot of his stuff and is reprinting it in his newsletter.  And, I have just told my readers about your websites, too.


Joe Trevison wrote:

"As a newsletter writer ...I feel awkward to recommend most of the other newsletter writers with ads and such feeling the newsletters...Yours is like mine ...not afraid of giving information and no ads ....I will be recommending your site to my readers and at some of the posting I do.  I am an accountant that worked for 15 years as a Revenue Agent for the IRS.  I also spent years studying marketing of Dan Kennedy and Jay Abraham and many others.  I plan to add business plans, financial consulting and finders services in my business and add several associates..  Your article has helped me with the financial services already...I was worried about the sources...it is the clients that I have to concentrate on."
 

Joe:

Thank You for your kind remarks. -- It is always a pleasure knowing I have been able to help in some small way. -- You won't go wrong studying the works of my old friends Dan & Jay. -- And, for those readers who love the IRS as much as I do ...

Joe Trevison (BS./MBA Former IRS Agent and CPA)  is the author of the Book "The Secrets Of The IRS By The Renegade Ex-Employee" -- http://www.somuch.com/renegade


Online Marketing Today ... http://www.onlinemarketingtoday.com ... is a good place to get free online marketing info.

Try it ... if you can't get through, keep trying.  The website is getting a major overhaul and may not be available all the time - but - when it is, I feel sure you'll find it a super-place you want to add to your bookmarks.



Well ... That's it for this month. -- In order to make every issue responsive to YOUR needs, please send me your questions; or tell me what sources or resources you need to build your business; or give me any thoughts you want to share with your fellow members.

Believe it or don't ... I ain't a mind-reader. -- If'n you doesn't tell me what you need, I may never touch upon the information, sources or resources you need.

This is your publication for you to use to your benefit ... I am just your moderator.

 Until next month, keep well ...

J.F. (Jim) STRAW
A Business Tortoise


Thought For The Month!

"Where you're headed is far more important than how fast you're going." -- Stephen R. Covey

In our hi-tech society, we seem to have forgotten the lessons we learned in kindergarten ... one of the most important being the fable of the Tortoise and the Hare.

Slow and steady always wins the race to success.


Can you stump the old master? -- Betcha can't!

Over the past 40 years (man and boy), I have made bundles of money in direct selling, service contracting, wholesale merchandising, entertainment (I was a professional Trumpet player, vocalist & Radio Announcer), freight forwarding, import/export, retail merchandising, warehousing, real estate, electronics manufacturing, finder's fees, closeout merchandising, financial brokerage, business consulting, steel fabrication, gold and coal mining, offshore banking, mailorder, writing, and publishing. -- That being the case ...

No matter what business you're in ... whether you're just starting, well on your way, or at the top of the heap ... I've probably been where you are, done what you are doing. -- So ...

Anytime you have a question about 'how' to do something in your business - or - if you have any comments about anything I've said in issues of this e-Letter; or if you want to add your 2 cents worth ... just "ask" me or "tell" me.

Send your Questions, Comments or 2 Cents Worth to ...

with "Question" - "Comment" - or, "2 Cents Worth" in the SUBJECT.

If I, personally, don't have an answer to any question you may ask, I will contact some of the professionals in your field of endeavor (I will probably know one or more personally) to get the real 'skinny' for you.


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